Episode 1 - The Choiceless Choice Part 1
In this emotional and heartfelt premiere episode of From Experience: The Grief Collection, host Bianca Welsh shares her deeply personal story of facing grief and loss with her husband James. Bianca recounts their journey through the traumatic experience of losing their son Herbert at 36+6 weeks, due to a termination for medical reason (TFMR). She details their emotional struggles, the decisions they had to make, their healing process, and the unique ways they've navigated grief together. The episode includes sensitive discussions about baby loss, mental health struggles, and the couple's emotional and painful journey towards finding some semblance of peace. Bianca also offers words of comfort and solidarity to those experiencing or curious about grief, highlighting the importance of storytelling and open conversations in healing.
To learn more about Bianca check out the About page.
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Music Credit: “Denali” by Bryant Lowry.
Written by Bryant Richard Lowry (BMI).
Published by Boss Soundstripe Productions (BMI).
Licensed via Soundstripe Inc.
EPISODE 1 + 2 GUEST: JAMES (JIMMY) WELSH
James, or Jimmy, is a larrikin who loves a good joke and a story. Fiercely loyal, he will go out of his way to help anyone who needs it and is known to be incredibly thoughtful and kind. James is a generous man who loves a good podcast, a great pair of socks and a fresh haircut. You could say he’s really embraced his Dad years. An avid distance runner, he enjoys spending his spare time coaching other runners to achieve their best.
He is a Sommelier/Restaurateur by trade, with over two decades of experience under his belt - a co-founder and operator of Black Cow Bistro from 2008 - 2022 and Stillwater Restaurant and Seven Rooms since 2010. James loves a spreadsheet and numbers and is considered a leader and a mentor in his field, he has numerous awards and accolades recognising his exceptionally well curated wine lists. His proudest professional moment was becoming a Len Evans Scholar in 2015.
As a male who has had a tumultuous journey of mental illness over many years, he is all too familiar with the stigma and judgment which comes with men’s mental health, he is committed to talking and sharing about his journey and to especially help loss Dad’s feel less alone.
The biggest joy in his life is are his children, Claude (9), Rani (2) and of course Herbert whom this podcast is dedicated to. Bianca and James have been together since 2005 and are very proud to bring this special project to the world.
Resources
Through the Unexpected - information and a list of support options for parents faced with prenatal diagnosis.
Pink Elephants Support Network - offers online grief support and information for miscarriage.
Red Nose or SANDS offers 24/7 telephone grief support on 1300 308 307
Bears of Hope - offers grief support on 1300 11 HOPE or via email: support@bearsofhope.org.au
**All of the above have specific TFMR pages
PANDA - Perinatal Anxiety and Depression Australia - supports the mental health of parents and families during pregnancy and in their first year of parenthood - or 1300 726 306.
Lifeline - 13 11 14
Heartfelt - volunteer organisation providing professional photographers to families who have experienced the loss of a baby or child living with serious or life threatening illness.
Books
The 4 books I ordered after leaving hospital:
The Grief Companion by Ngaio Parr.
The Baby Loss Guide by Zoe Clark-Coates.
Life After Baby Loss: A Companion and Guide for Parents by Nicola Gaskin.
Miles Apart by Annabel Bower (Note this is Australian!).
00:00 Introduction to the Podcast
00:55 Why a Grief Podcast?
02:14 Acknowledging Sensitive Topics
03:18 Introducing the First Episode
04:02 Meet My Husband, James
05:14 Our Parenting Journey
05:59 Deciding to Have Another Child
08:36 The Pregnancy Journey
11:35 Discovering Complications
15:32 Facing the Diagnosis
19:48 Navigating the Unknown
24:45 The MRI and the Hard Decisions
54:25 The Final Decision
57:36 The Decision and Its Aftermath
58:51 Navigating the Psych Assessment
01:06:42 The Feticide Procedure
01:18:42 The Birth and Meeting Herb
01:34:33 Saying Goodbye and Returning Home
01:44:34 Reflections and Healing
01:48:19 Conclusion and Support